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Pride and Promiscuity: The Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen

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In 1999, two amateur Jane Austen scholars staying at an English estate stumbled upon a hidden cache of manuscript pages and made the literary discovery of the century -- the lost sex scenes from Jane Austen's novels. Published here for the first time, the lost pages display Emma taking self-satisfaction to a whole new level, and reveal Henry Crawford's thorough exploration In 1999, two amateur Jane Austen scholars staying at an English estate stumbled upon a hidden cache of manuscript pages and made the literary discovery of the century -- the lost sex scenes from Jane Austen's novels. Published here for the first time, the lost pages display Emma taking self-satisfaction to a whole new level, and reveal Henry Crawford's thorough exploration of "brotherly love" at Mansfield Park. If you've ever wondered what really happened in the drawing rooms of Austen's beloved characters, "Pride and Promiscuity" will satisfy your curiosity...and a whole lot more.


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In 1999, two amateur Jane Austen scholars staying at an English estate stumbled upon a hidden cache of manuscript pages and made the literary discovery of the century -- the lost sex scenes from Jane Austen's novels. Published here for the first time, the lost pages display Emma taking self-satisfaction to a whole new level, and reveal Henry Crawford's thorough exploration In 1999, two amateur Jane Austen scholars staying at an English estate stumbled upon a hidden cache of manuscript pages and made the literary discovery of the century -- the lost sex scenes from Jane Austen's novels. Published here for the first time, the lost pages display Emma taking self-satisfaction to a whole new level, and reveal Henry Crawford's thorough exploration of "brotherly love" at Mansfield Park. If you've ever wondered what really happened in the drawing rooms of Austen's beloved characters, "Pride and Promiscuity" will satisfy your curiosity...and a whole lot more.

30 review for Pride and Promiscuity: The Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen

  1. 4 out of 5

    Sarah

    Well, who hasn't wanted to beat Mr. Collins with a riding crop? Well, who hasn't wanted to beat Mr. Collins with a riding crop?

  2. 5 out of 5

    Kristina

    Once again, misguided curiosity has taken me to a mediocre book. Pride and Promiscuity: The Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen by Arielle Eckstut and Dennis Ashton wants to be funny (or maybe even scandalous?) but is not. It fails completely in execution. My only genuine snort of amusement came at the very end in “Persuasion: the Prequel.” A character is thinking how great his large, full-length mirrors will look in his library once he’s removed all the books. That’s rather amusing. As for all the o Once again, misguided curiosity has taken me to a mediocre book. Pride and Promiscuity: The Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen by Arielle Eckstut and Dennis Ashton wants to be funny (or maybe even scandalous?) but is not. It fails completely in execution. My only genuine snort of amusement came at the very end in “Persuasion: the Prequel.” A character is thinking how great his large, full-length mirrors will look in his library once he’s removed all the books. That’s rather amusing. As for all the other “lost” sex scenes, mostly I rolled my eyes at the groan-worthy (and obvious) double entendres. The sex scenes are not sexy or funny; the puns and juvenile humor are so tasteless and idiotic as to make the reader feel embarrassed for the authors. Ironically, these supposed lurid sex scenes are mostly innuendo and vague descriptions. I’ve read Judy Blume young adult novels that were more explicit (and better written). The premise of Pride and Promiscuity is that two American tourists retracing the steps of Jane Austen just happen to find lost scenes from Jane Austen’s novels. They are sex scenes that Austen had to excise from her novels in order to publish them. This gag is carried throughout with an introduction by a fake Jane Austen scholar and scholarly footnotes to articles that (probably) don’t exist. Each sex scene is presented within the context of its surrounding story. Eckstut and Ashton often quote preceding text from the novel (the actual novel) in italics, then insert the discovered sex scene where fictitious Austen scholars decided it was cut. Sometimes this works, but often it does not. The premise of this joke does not work. These sex scenes (if they truly existed) would have changed the course of the novels and how the characters behaved towards each other. If Austen had written a lesbian threesome between Jane Bennet, Mrs. Hurst and Miss Bingley (Pride and Prejudice), the rest of the novel would have been entirely different. Scenes such as these could not be simply cut from the novel. Also, the set-up for the sex scene is usually wrong. The authors/fake editors/Austen scholars (?) introduce the scenes by saying, well, scholars have always wondered about this or that event in the novel because it’s never explained—oh, but now that we have these scenes, the confusion is gone. This scholarly confusion is completely fictitious and the characters’ actions are fully explained by the events of the story. No fake sex scenes are required. I know I’m being pedantic about this, but c’mon. If you’re going to do a (fake) scholarly interpretation of the novels, do it better than this. I’m not a scholar, but I’ve read most of these novels a few times and I cried foul on the reasoning immediately. Also, the sex scenes often do not match Austen’s voice and (even more clumsily) tell the story from a POV not seen again in the novel, such as the excised scene from P&P. It’s told from Jane’s POV, however the rest of the novel is never from her POV. So Austen did that just to write a ridiculous sex scene? I wouldn’t be surprised if the authors made a list of various sex acts then matched them to characters from each book, checking them off as they wrote. There’s lesbian threesome sex, masturbation, fantasy, incest, spanking, sex toys, cross-dressing, more serious BDSM, and “buggery” (gay sex). All of the scenes are ridiculous and void of humor. I found the implied bestiality between Edward and his horse (Sense and Sensibility) the most tasteless. This scene, which is actually an Elinor and Marianne Dashwood sister chat about their sexual experiences, is also the most inane. The sisters’ dialogue resembles two dipshit teenagers from a modern YA novel (“Did you touch it? Yes, I touched it!) and is eye-rolling stupid. The authors went to great lengths to keep finding objects or words that imply “penis”: swords, billiard cues, etc. There’s also suggestive phrases: a male character’s “hard nature,” and “premature ecstasy.” More eye-rolling. The incest scene between Henry and Mary Crawford of Mansfield Park is just…yuck. The two characters (who are horrible people) are made even worse by mocking Fanny and Edmund for being overly straitlaced and religious. This pissed me off for some reason because the accusations are false and this nastiness is clumsy and indicative of the juvenile sense of humor that the authors of this book possess. I know some reviewers found the spanking scene between Charlotte and Mr. Collins to be funny, but I didn’t. It’s too over the top stupid for me. It requires (as do all the scenes) the characters to behave in ways that are outside of their personalities. It’s not that you cannot create sex scenes for all of these people (well, the married ones), it’s just the scenes need to correspond with their personalities. Realistically, would Jane Austen have any clue about this kind of sexual variety? You’re talking about a woman who never married, whose father was a reverend. She didn’t even move about in the kind of society that would have known about or engaged in these kinds of activities. Another reason the premise of Pride and Promiscuity doesn’t work for: Austen didn’t have the experience to have the imagination to create these scenes. And if you think, well, no one did at that time—au contraire! I have before me a book called The Pearl. It is a collection of Victorian England stories published in an underground magazine of erotica. A retired professor who collected Victorian erotica donated his whole collection to the university library I was employed at and I, out of curiosity, snapped up this book. It’s very explicit and devoid of any kind of romance or other adventures. Just lots of vivid descriptions of throbbing cocks and all that. That’s not really my thing so I’m going to donate it to my local library, but it really puts the fictitious lost Jane Austen sex scenes to shame. They’re children’s bedtime stories compared with this stuff. I don’t recommend Pride and Promiscuity. The premise is shaky and doesn’t hold up and worst of all, it’s just not funny. The authors could have done this better by writing an entirely original novel in the style of Austen and hailing it as a lost Jane Austen novel—but radically different in that it includes sex scenes. I don’t think that would have successful either based on their inability to write humor, but at least they wouldn’t have put their grimy paws all over beloved Austen classics.

  3. 4 out of 5

    Lauren

    A friend loaned this to me because he thought it was hilarious. I was skeptical, but decided to give it a read. I made it through about a third of the book before I put it down, and I have no intention of picking it up again. There are so many things that are very terribly wrong with this book. First, although the authors claim that they're familiar with Austen's voice and have preserved it perfectly, I beg to disagree. It's off, so very off, and painfully obvious. It reads more like fan fic writ A friend loaned this to me because he thought it was hilarious. I was skeptical, but decided to give it a read. I made it through about a third of the book before I put it down, and I have no intention of picking it up again. There are so many things that are very terribly wrong with this book. First, although the authors claim that they're familiar with Austen's voice and have preserved it perfectly, I beg to disagree. It's off, so very off, and painfully obvious. It reads more like fan fic written by a moderately skilled teenager. Second, although I have no problem with admitting that people in the Regency era were sexual beings, and even (gasp) engaged in such scandalous behavior as premarital sex and extramarital affairs, the situations envisioned by Eckstut and Ashton are so very modern and contrived that they don't fit the characters at all. Third, the book (perhaps jokingly) claims that these scenes fill in some missing holes in the novels, but if anything, they would have made the stories seem even more confusing. I understand this is supposed to be a parody, but it's not very well done. It's just bizarre.

  4. 5 out of 5

    Deborah Siddoway

    My sister gave me this book many many Christmases ago with a note to say I would be absolutely mortified. That it was appalling. I am writing this review solely to confirm that she was indeed quite astute in her prediction. In short, she was right. Appalling just about covers it.

  5. 5 out of 5

    ✘✘ Sarah ✘✘ (former Nefarious Breeder of Murderous Crustaceans)

    The idea behind this book is really fun but the way it is written is so unoriginal, so unlike Austen! The dialogues definitely lacked Austen's wit, fast pacing and precise writing. What I found particularly amazing was what Elsa A. Solender (President of the Jane Austen Society of North America) had to say about this book:"A wickedly funny collection of X-rated parodies of Jane Austen's fiction…echoing her incomparable style with astonishing fidelity" Astonishing fidelity? I'm wondering if we re The idea behind this book is really fun but the way it is written is so unoriginal, so unlike Austen! The dialogues definitely lacked Austen's wit, fast pacing and precise writing. What I found particularly amazing was what Elsa A. Solender (President of the Jane Austen Society of North America) had to say about this book:"A wickedly funny collection of X-rated parodies of Jane Austen's fiction…echoing her incomparable style with astonishing fidelity" Astonishing fidelity? I'm wondering if we read the same book! And this woman is supposed to be the President of the Jane Austen Society of North America??!! Stunning! Anyway, the stories become very repetitive and, after a few chapters, the book is just plainly boring... Jane Austen would definitely *not* approve, mainly because the book is so badly written!

  6. 5 out of 5

    Girl with her Head in a Book

    For my full review: https://girlwithherheadinabook.co.uk/... For me, the strangest thing about this book is that it was published in 2003. Discovering it by accident in a charity shop, I assumed that it was part of the post-Fifty Shades bonanza for stuffing sex scenes into classic fiction. But then I remembered that the more things change, the more they stay the same. Lack of overt passion in Austen's novels has been a sticking point since her books first hit the shelves. Even Charlotte Brontë fo For my full review: https://girlwithherheadinabook.co.uk/... For me, the strangest thing about this book is that it was published in 2003. Discovering it by accident in a charity shop, I assumed that it was part of the post-Fifty Shades bonanza for stuffing sex scenes into classic fiction. But then I remembered that the more things change, the more they stay the same. Lack of overt passion in Austen's novels has been a sticking point since her books first hit the shelves. Even Charlotte Brontë found Austen's writing hard to connect with on these grounds. So instead, remedies are sought and the main solution is fan fiction. Strange to say, but this is actually not the first piece of Austen-inspired erotica that I have ever read however it is by far the silliest. The premise is that two Austen scholars were staying at an English estate in 1999 and they uncovered a cache of letters by Austen which had been hidden after her death by her sister Cassandra. The letters detail Austen's battles with her publisher who express their horror at the scandalous content of her novels and demand that the offending scenes be cut out. She was forced to comply but with Pride and Promiscuity, we are finally reading her books as she really wanted them to be read. Ahem. What makes me laugh about the other reviews is how so many of them seem to have completely missed the joke. 'Some' of the scenarios weren't realistic, bleated one. Another complained that Eckstut hadn't 'quite' captured Austen's voice. Yes, the scenes are ludicrous and far-fetched. Of course they are. This is a book about sex scenes in Jane Austen. Get a grip! Jane Bennet's illness at Netherfield is revealed as being due to the trauma at having to fend off the lesbian advances of both of Mr Bingley's sisters. Elinor and Marianne Dashwood discuss their sexual exploits which include Elinor pleasuring both Edward Ferrars and his horse. Henry and Mary Crawford's relationship appears to have shades of the Lannisters about it. This book is a pastiche. We are not being asked to take it seriously. To be frank, I found the earnest efforts within Scenes Jane Austen Never Wrote infinitely more irksomene since their authors clearly believed them to be credible. Radio 4's sitcom Old Harry's Game has a recurring joke where Jane Austen is revealed to be a foul-mouthed Cockney who is quick with her fists. I could snigger at Pride and Promiscuity in a similar vein. It's not actually particularly explicit. If you want tasteful imaginings of intimacy between the new Mr and Mrs Darcy, I think you'd be better with Scenes Jane Austen Never Wrote. Here they just bonk on the grass while making awkward chit-chat. But even that is a clear play on the sexual tension which is so obvious when they have their unexpected encounter at Pemberley. Yes, it's sending up the novel rather than something to be taken seriously, but that doesn't mean that Eckstut hasn't picked up on something. There are definite moments which raised a laugh. I had to admire how Eckstut had pieced together so many of the most memorable phrases from Austen's personal correspondence and jigsawed it together to produce letters explaining the book's existence. The imagined scene where Charlotte Collins (nee Lucas) dresses up as Lady Catherine in dominatrix mode and orders her husband around was probably the most successful of the novel. We all knew that there was something very weird in Mr Collins' servility towards his beloved patroness. The idea of Emma pleasuring herself out of sheer delight at her own wonderfulness also has a ring of truth. The imagined scene of Mr Palmer utterly ignoring his wife's attempts to dream up fantasy scenarios made me giggle given that a university lecturer once commented in class that it was a real mystery how the two of them ever conceived a child. I also loved the idea that The Watsons had had to be abandoned entirely because it was just pure filth. However. These were isolated moments among a lot of other scenes which were less successful. Ultimately it was not as entertaining a read as I might have hoped. Despite presenting us with this anarchic re-imagining of the sex lives of Austen's characters, Eckstut's writing never feels particularly creative. ITV's Lost in Austen introduced a version of Wickham who was a true gentleman and who had taken the blame for Georgiana Darcy's attempt to seduce him to avoid her getting into trouble with her brother. We thought we knew the story, they flipped it on its head - it was hilarious. There are no equivalent moments here. Eckstut has tried to be outlandish here but aside from the Collins episode, her inventions fail to really bite into the text. More pertinently, in her desire to shock, she missed out some of the more obvious pairings. What kind of a relationship were Edward Ferrars and Lucy Steele having? How did Lucy end up switching brothers? Then there's Willoughby who was an accomplished and shameless seducer. Did Isabella Thorpe actually have sex with Frederick Tilney? Weirdest of them all, how did Henry Crawford end up sleeping with Maria Bertram when he was supposedly in love with Fanny Price? What Eckstut - and indeed many Austen readers - seem to have missed is that there are no 'lost sex scenes'. The sex in Austen has always been there. You just have to pay attention. I have probably mentioned before about when I first read His Dark Materials at the age of fourteen, how I was startled to hear two of my male friends discussing the sex scene between Will and Lyra. I was certain that no such thing existed. When I reread the book a few years ago, I spotted it straight away. So it is with Jane Austen. In John Mullan's spectacular What Matters in Jane Austen, he analyses the presence of sex in the novels and the important role of sexual desire across Austen's works. Helena Kelly's The Secret Radical takes the topic further, theorising that a key passage in Northanger Abbey represents masturbation, that Harriet Smith in Emma is Miss Bates' illegitimate child and that Edward Ferrars may be sexually deviant. She also traces out some of the disturbing implications around the sad history of Colonel Brandon's childhood love Eliza. Through her anti-heroine Mary Crawford, Jane Austen showed that she understood a rude joke about 'rears and vices'. Her side character Tom Bertram observed that Mrs Grant must lead a 'dull life' with the doctor and be in need of a lover. The assumed Prim Jane Austen does not exist. We know that sex is not overt in Austen but much of the action of the novels depends upon it. If it is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a large fortune must be in want of a wife, why is that? Because of male sexual desire; if a man has enough money to support a wife, it is assumed that he will want one. Mr Darcy is drawn to Elizabeth Bennet so strongly that all of his attempts to restrain himself are futile. He proposes even though he believes her to be an entirely unsuitable wife because he desires her. Mr Collins and Mr Elton are both characters described as being ready for marriage - this seems to be an Austen euphemism. Then there are the various husbands across all the books who seem to have blundered into wedlock with wives who they cannot respect because they were fooled by a fair face. Mr Bennet, Mr Palmer, John Knightley, Charles Musgrove - the list goes on. They may bicker, squabble or even ignore each other in public but plentiful offspring appear nonetheless. Even Charlotte Lucas, who manages her household so that she can spend as little time as possible with her husband, is pregnant by the end of Pride and Prejudice. Pride and Promiscuity bases its humour on the assumption that Jane Austen definitely knew nothing about sex, therefore it is comedic to write a book with a version of her being depraved. Since we know that the first point is not true, the joke doesn't quite work. Rather than ignoring sex, Austen's novels are often poking fun at the extent to which human behaviour is driven by it. So if Pride and Promiscuity is not entirely successful as a parody, does it work as effective pornography? Well. Here, I have to admit that I am not really the right person to judge. But I think probably not. A fun read but not one I am ever likely to revisit.

  7. 5 out of 5

    Linda

    Yeah, what do I think about this book..? Funny but also a bit rude, call me a prude but I want my Austen sex-free. The Mr & Mrs Collins part was fun though

  8. 4 out of 5

    Brynn

    The. Worst. Shit. Do not recommend. Not even my love of Austen and tongue-in-cheek humor could prevent me from flinging this into my nearest Little Library at the first opportunity. Go darken someone else's bookshelf you slim hack. The. Worst. Shit. Do not recommend. Not even my love of Austen and tongue-in-cheek humor could prevent me from flinging this into my nearest Little Library at the first opportunity. Go darken someone else's bookshelf you slim hack.

  9. 4 out of 5

    Diane

    Absolute rubbish!

  10. 5 out of 5

    Milliebot

    This review and others posted over at my blog . From the back of the book: In 2002, an amateur Jane Austen scholar, while staying at Hertfordshire estate, stumbled upon a hidden cache of manuscript pages and made an extraordinary literary discovery - lost scenes from Jane Austen's novels that reveal an altogether different dimension of her oeuvre. This book, much like The Princess Bride, would have you believe that it's contents are legitimate; except that William Goldman really tricked me int This review and others posted over at my blog . From the back of the book: In 2002, an amateur Jane Austen scholar, while staying at Hertfordshire estate, stumbled upon a hidden cache of manuscript pages and made an extraordinary literary discovery - lost scenes from Jane Austen's novels that reveal an altogether different dimension of her oeuvre. This book, much like The Princess Bride, would have you believe that it's contents are legitimate; except that William Goldman really tricked me into thinking his story was real :| . Eckstut proves that her findings of Auten's lost manuscripts are legitimate by including a letter of approval from English professor, Elfrida Drummond, authoress of splendid works, such as Pride in Punctuation and Proof and Prejudice. Alas, dear readers, Jane Austen didn't hide away sex scenes that her publisher refused to allow into all six of her novels, but this book was still a quick, quirky little read. There's nothing erotic (in my opinion) about this novel, so if you're looking for detailed intimate moments between Elizabeth and Darcy, per say, you should probably look elsewhere. The best thing about this book is that Eckstut did her best to stick to the language of Austen's time and the scenes felt almost authentic. I say almost for two reasons: the writing doesn't really have Austen's voice, and some of the scenarios are too ridiculous to be believed. Re: Miss Bingley and Hurst involved in a threesome with Jane Bennett to test her marital suitability to Bingley. Again, there's nothing vulgar or overly explicit in the details, but the themes are intended for adult readers. Some scenes made me roll my eyes - primarily the one mentioned above, but others did make me chuckle. Re: Emma pleasuring herself to the thought of how useful she is to everyone in her life and "how essential she was to the flawless running of the household." At 145 pages I didn't feel like I wasted my time, and I actually wished it were a little longer. Eckstut had some very clever moments and I would have loved to see them further developed, especially the comedic aspects. This book didn't blow me away, but if you're open-minded and in the mood for a chuckle or two, check it out! If you're looking for hot and heavy Regency-era action, I'd say look elsewhere.

  11. 4 out of 5

    Sophia

    Pride and Promiscuity was recommended as a funny read by a member of a Goodreads group I’m in, so I thought I’d give it a try. I wish I’d never bothered. The book assumes that the author has discovered a hidden cache of explicit scenes which were cut from all Jane Austen’s famous novels. Austen, we are told, was not the typical 19th century prudish spinster; on the contrary, she had a very active imagination and invented all sorts of sexual shenanigans for her characters, which only the horrified Pride and Promiscuity was recommended as a funny read by a member of a Goodreads group I’m in, so I thought I’d give it a try. I wish I’d never bothered. The book assumes that the author has discovered a hidden cache of explicit scenes which were cut from all Jane Austen’s famous novels. Austen, we are told, was not the typical 19th century prudish spinster; on the contrary, she had a very active imagination and invented all sorts of sexual shenanigans for her characters, which only the horrified consternation of her publishers forced her to cut. My suspension of disbelief was struggling before I’d even got to the scenes themselves, but it’s meant to be a funny book so I did at least try to get into the spirit of things! Each of the novels has a couple of “lost” scenes, so you will need a pretty good knowledge of Austen’s work to remember who’s who. Some of these were extremely cringe-making, such as Jane Bennett being inspected for fitness to marry Mr Bingley by his sisters (eewwww!) and an incestuous scene between Henry and Mary Crawford from Mansfield Park. Wrong, just wrong. The idea that Jane Austen could have ever even thought of such things is a leap too far for my imagination, and there was a big part of me that thought this was little more than an insult to her memory. The style of writing was also decidedly off, and didn’t come anywhere close to matching Jane Austen’s own mastery of the English language. You might ask what I expected when I ordered a book like this. I had hoped for a slightly risqué pastiche that would make me laugh, but this wasn’t it. There was just one scene that raised a small smile, in which Charlotte Lucas dresses up as Lady Catherine de Bourgh and takes a riding crop to Mr Collins! All the rest were pretty horrible.

  12. 5 out of 5

    Katia M. Davis

    I think the author should have done a little more research into styles of pre-Victorian erotica before putting pen to paper. It's all very well to try and mimic Austen's voice, but when it comes out like fan fiction sex it is funny for all the wrong reasons. The writing felt forced, it did not read smoothly like Austen (despite her paragraph long sentences), dialogue didn't show the same depth in characters, and I thought it all rather trivial. I'm sure if Austen had left us some raunchy sex sce I think the author should have done a little more research into styles of pre-Victorian erotica before putting pen to paper. It's all very well to try and mimic Austen's voice, but when it comes out like fan fiction sex it is funny for all the wrong reasons. The writing felt forced, it did not read smoothly like Austen (despite her paragraph long sentences), dialogue didn't show the same depth in characters, and I thought it all rather trivial. I'm sure if Austen had left us some raunchy sex scenes tucked away in a box somewhere, they would have been more enticing and character driven than these, "oh what a large billiard cue you have" efforts. I wasn't a fan.

  13. 4 out of 5

    Ape

    I got this in the post today from a bookmoocher in the US. It's not a long book, so I have already read it this evening. It's a bit silly, but quite entertaining. You do need to know the Jane Austen stories, otherwise the characters and how these imagined sex scenes fit into the originals won't mean so much. To be fair, although this is humour, she's done a pretty good job with the language and style and picking up on what kind of perverse little traits some of the characters might have had, wer I got this in the post today from a bookmoocher in the US. It's not a long book, so I have already read it this evening. It's a bit silly, but quite entertaining. You do need to know the Jane Austen stories, otherwise the characters and how these imagined sex scenes fit into the originals won't mean so much. To be fair, although this is humour, she's done a pretty good job with the language and style and picking up on what kind of perverse little traits some of the characters might have had, were Jane Austen's books more explicit.

  14. 4 out of 5

    Beth

    Mostly it's good fun and occasionally quite sweet. This is one of the few times I've believed in a romantic connection between Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy. I think it could stand to be less teasing and more explicit, but I enjoyed it. Mostly it's good fun and occasionally quite sweet. This is one of the few times I've believed in a romantic connection between Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy. I think it could stand to be less teasing and more explicit, but I enjoyed it.

  15. 4 out of 5

    Gretchen

    This book is hillarious. It gives a completley different look into Jane Austen's mind. Even if it's not real (I haven't made up my mind on that) it's totally worth it. This book is hillarious. It gives a completley different look into Jane Austen's mind. Even if it's not real (I haven't made up my mind on that) it's totally worth it.

  16. 5 out of 5

    Tahleen

    This book was amazing. Graphic but yet still managed to be proper. It was pretty hilarious esp if you've read all the books. I think the pictures and their captions were the best parts. This book was amazing. Graphic but yet still managed to be proper. It was pretty hilarious esp if you've read all the books. I think the pictures and their captions were the best parts.

  17. 4 out of 5

    Lisa

    Hilariously bizarre! Perfect for Austen fans who don't mind a bit of bawdy humour. Hilariously bizarre! Perfect for Austen fans who don't mind a bit of bawdy humour.

  18. 4 out of 5

    Sarah

    A better parody than Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, but that's not saying much. A better parody than Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, but that's not saying much.

  19. 5 out of 5

    Cecillie

    Yeah big no from me. The idea is funny. I'm all for fan fiction, I'm all for erotic fan fiction. But this is just bad and really, really boring, surprisingly. I've seen a review saying that these "found" scenes don't fit in where they're supposed to be, and I've got to agree. A couple of the stories are also super uncomfortable to read. I'm usually a "don't like don't read"-kind of fan fic reader, and I'm not a fan of the purity culture that's been really purvasive in fan culture for some time no Yeah big no from me. The idea is funny. I'm all for fan fiction, I'm all for erotic fan fiction. But this is just bad and really, really boring, surprisingly. I've seen a review saying that these "found" scenes don't fit in where they're supposed to be, and I've got to agree. A couple of the stories are also super uncomfortable to read. I'm usually a "don't like don't read"-kind of fan fic reader, and I'm not a fan of the purity culture that's been really purvasive in fan culture for some time now. But I really don't like reading incest, and I doubt Austen would write a brother/sister couple... cousins? Yeah, that was a bit more normal from what a gather, but not brother and sister. And then there's the first story, which is probably the worst way to start a book ever. This story reads like a sexual assualt in my opinion. Jane does a lot of mental gymnastics to participate in what's happening, and I'm not here for it. Now that I think about it... the two strictly (there's a threesome, also with questionable consent) same-sex stories have consent issues. I find it kind of insulting that the lgbtq+ stories/interactions are painted in a predatory gross light. I also think the author comes across as super arrogant. Part of it is just how the preface and introduction is written. She keeps writing in this old school style, even for the parts that's supposed to describes what happened whenever she "found" the lost chapters. It comes across as confused and annoying, and overall it doesn't work as a literary device. I thought this was going to be funny but it really, really wasn't!

  20. 4 out of 5

    Christina

    Though a short book, I didn’t get very far into this before giving up on it. It’s fiction, of course, but written to seem like a scholarly work. There’s a fair amount of time devoted to a story about how the authors found the lost sex scenes Jane Austen’s editor forced her to cut, asserting their expertise in Austen. This is followed by an equally long faux introduction by an Austen scholar. After all the assurances of what experts the authors are in Austen and her voice, I expected more than wh Though a short book, I didn’t get very far into this before giving up on it. It’s fiction, of course, but written to seem like a scholarly work. There’s a fair amount of time devoted to a story about how the authors found the lost sex scenes Jane Austen’s editor forced her to cut, asserting their expertise in Austen. This is followed by an equally long faux introduction by an Austen scholar. After all the assurances of what experts the authors are in Austen and her voice, I expected more than what I found. The “lost scenes” read like poorly written fan fiction. The book is sold with the premise that these scenes will sound like Austen, but instead it’s just bad purple prose. And not even good bad purple prose—there are people who love and understand the romance genre well enough to write hilariously intentionally bad sex scenes, and annual awards for the worst sex scenes of the year, probably unintentionally so, and equally hilarious (Google and enjoy.) Granted, I only tried two of these brief scenes and couldn’t bring myself to finish reading either, so maybe it gets better, but I’m not willing to invest the time to find out.

  21. 4 out of 5

    S.J.

    There are already very mixed reviews on this book. Although I have only read Sense and Sensibility (which I enjoyed) by Jane Austen I was quite intrigued when I saw this paperback version in a second hand store. I actually feel that this book has completed what it set out to do, and this is, to unearth 'the lost sex scenes of Jane Austen' - Although this is totally fabricated I felt that the 'lost scenes' were rather funny. I do feel that whether you are a Jane Austen fan or not, you do have to There are already very mixed reviews on this book. Although I have only read Sense and Sensibility (which I enjoyed) by Jane Austen I was quite intrigued when I saw this paperback version in a second hand store. I actually feel that this book has completed what it set out to do, and this is, to unearth 'the lost sex scenes of Jane Austen' - Although this is totally fabricated I felt that the 'lost scenes' were rather funny. I do feel that whether you are a Jane Austen fan or not, you do have to have a sense humour, adventure and an imagination to read this book. I think Arielle Eckstut gave herself a rather large task in trying to write these lost sex scenes, and I feel she has succeeded - So well done Arielle. As this book may be considered 'a little racy' I would recommend this be read by over 18's. I also feel that this book would be good on holiday or on long travels. And yes, even by the bedside!

  22. 5 out of 5

    Ellie Pauline

    This book is an odd read, and not for the reasons it would lead you to believe. Based on the title and premise (a rather flimsy premise of 2 Americans stumbling upon Austen's lost work) I would have expected this book to be either half decent erotica or a tongue and cheek humorous retelling of Austen's works. It somehow manages to be neither, and so while the stories were charming in their own way and an easy read I'm not convinced the authors achieved what they set out to with this novel. This book is an odd read, and not for the reasons it would lead you to believe. Based on the title and premise (a rather flimsy premise of 2 Americans stumbling upon Austen's lost work) I would have expected this book to be either half decent erotica or a tongue and cheek humorous retelling of Austen's works. It somehow manages to be neither, and so while the stories were charming in their own way and an easy read I'm not convinced the authors achieved what they set out to with this novel.

  23. 4 out of 5

    Alicia

    I found this at goodwill and figured it would be entertaining enough for what I paid for it, but it's mostly just mediocre writing. I do appreciate that it wasn't entirely heteronormative but most of these "excerpts" felt way too contrived to even be fun. I don't consider myself versed in Austen at all, but even I could tell the style was completely off. I found this at goodwill and figured it would be entertaining enough for what I paid for it, but it's mostly just mediocre writing. I do appreciate that it wasn't entirely heteronormative but most of these "excerpts" felt way too contrived to even be fun. I don't consider myself versed in Austen at all, but even I could tell the style was completely off.

  24. 4 out of 5

    Heather

    An intriguing idea, but flawed execution. This book throws every taboo into Austen's beloved stories. A lesbian scene between Bingley's sisters and Jane in Pride and Prejudice puts a new spin on why Bingley and Jane were separated. Added bestiality to Sense and Sensibility and incest between the Crawford siblings in Mansfield Park did not make anything better. I wish I could unread this! An intriguing idea, but flawed execution. This book throws every taboo into Austen's beloved stories. A lesbian scene between Bingley's sisters and Jane in Pride and Prejudice puts a new spin on why Bingley and Jane were separated. Added bestiality to Sense and Sensibility and incest between the Crawford siblings in Mansfield Park did not make anything better. I wish I could unread this!

  25. 5 out of 5

    Fifitrixibooks

    Laugh out loud funny. A great read for fans of Jane Austen with a sense of humour.

  26. 4 out of 5

    Xanthi

    There were some truly amusing parts to this book but it could have done without the incest and implied bestiality! The passage about Mr Collins was probably the best piece.

  27. 4 out of 5

    Victoria (Victoria's Reading Pantry)

    I usually don't enjoy satire, but this book was right up my alley! I usually don't enjoy satire, but this book was right up my alley!

  28. 4 out of 5

    Ruthie

    As with Pride & Prejudice and the Zombies, poor old Jane Austen has to endure her work being pulled this way and that. Hey ho.

  29. 4 out of 5

    Rachel

    What could have been an entertaining diversion just ended up being a pretty creepy book. Loved the idea...did not like the execution at all.

  30. 5 out of 5

    Ellissa

    Okay.... I feel like I should explain why this book appealed to me in the first place. I just moved and found this book in a secondhand bookstore when exploring the neighbourhood and bought it for $4 and the cover and the idea of it just made me laugh. Also it isn't a particularly long book so I read it that afternoon. To say this is an addition to the beloved world of Jane Austen that can be skipped is an understatement. The book isn't terribly explicit in terms of content and if you were entirel Okay.... I feel like I should explain why this book appealed to me in the first place. I just moved and found this book in a secondhand bookstore when exploring the neighbourhood and bought it for $4 and the cover and the idea of it just made me laugh. Also it isn't a particularly long book so I read it that afternoon. To say this is an addition to the beloved world of Jane Austen that can be skipped is an understatement. The book isn't terribly explicit in terms of content and if you were entirely keeping to character marriage night sex scenes might get a little boring really. But some of the character choices were a little....questionable. Most notably in the case of Jane from Pride and Prejudice the scene sticks out as an odd choice. The book retains the pretence that the author "discovered" these papers rejected by Jane Austen's publisher and that they are indeed excerpts removed from the novels themselves. While Eckstut does manage to retain some of Austen's flair in the additions it is still apparent that they are not completely original. For that alone this book is 2 out of 5 stars rather than 1. My opinion. Skip this. But enjoy the cover art.

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